GIVING UP

I spent some time with friends recently, my wife and I did, in order to share what was on our hearts. It's tough doing that - removing oneself from what we believe to be protective isolation, and baring our souls to others. There's a mixture of believing no one else desires to know our struggles, and believing that no one else can understand them. That dark and lonely and selfish place becomes both our blanket and our prison.

Repeatedly, we're reminded of the benefits of honesty and relationships, and repeatedly, we're tricked into scampering off in fear to be alone once more as we wallow in our pain. Practice doesn't actually make perfect, but faithful persistence does change the heart. And so it was as we spoke to our friends, laughing and sighing and crying and wondering.

Once we set our sights on something we want, we'll do almost anything to get it. Almost anything. We pray for our will to be done instead of seeking His, and then we react with anger and passivity when once again we're reminded of the fact that it all doesn't revolve around us. Begging and pleading with seemingly no response, we ultimately resign ourselves to a place of self absorption ... Instead of taking one more step.

The "almost anything" is where He wants us. The world tells us that giving up is precisely what we should never do: Maintain that white knuckle grip and never let go, for it's only the weak who don't persevere. It's a lie that repeats itself until it's believed and yet, it ultimately never works out. Our brokenness and willingness to bow down to people assures us that temporal success will be achieved through this mentality. But, in the end, it falls short. It always does.

I stop looking around and I start looking up. I relinquish my imaginary control. I give up.

And a door is opened.  

PARENTING

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it. ~ Proverbs 22:6

We are called to be and make disciples, and while young people are certainly not the only ones who need a Savior, the path toward a relationship with Christ begins the moment we come into this world. You may or may not be a parent, but you absolutely have the power to make a positive difference in the lives of children. The influence we have as adults is indisputable; meaning, we don't get to choose if we have influence or not - we just do. However, the impact of that influence is well within our power.

I want my daughters to know I love God, their mother, them, and all people. I want them to know I will fail, miserably at times, at demonstrating this on a consistent basis. I want them to know the grace provided to us through Jesus covers it all, and I can only hope to demonstrate a mere fraction of this grace to others. So, I ask myself consistently if I am doing what I claim to believe. And, if I am not, I ask myself consistently what I should say and do differently to avoid the laziness and hypocrisy that's so easy to return to.

My testimony is similar to many others I know. Regardless of how we come to know Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, it seems as though nearly all of us never know we need a Savior until we know how broken we are. And, we seem to never know how broken we are until we stumble and fall on our own - usually over and over and over again. The hardest lessons are the ones we have to learn ourselves. While we hope for shortcuts, there are none.

I want my children to obey and be safe. I don't want my children to resist and feel pain. But, you know, they will, and we have to let them. Encouraging disobedience and unsafe behavior is not the same as recognizing the reality it will and typically even needs to happen. That, in the end, is what trusting God is all about: We can't do it ourselves, but instead need Him, and He knows best - always.

I'm sure glad He's my Dad.

THE ICKY

I wish we talked about grace as much as we talked about sin.

I mean, we're obsessed with sin. We rank people according to how bad we think their sins are and how much or how little we believe they are convicted by their sins. We speak of loving the sinner but hating the sin. And, we're reminded that if there was no sin, there would be no need for a Savior. But, that's really the point, isn't it? There is a Savior.

Spending so much of our time talking about sin distracts from and even makes light of the fact that grace actually exists and it is powerful beyond measure. In our distorted sense of reality, that world of human frailty and brokenness, we believe that if we stop talking about sin we'll sin more and not understand the need for a Savior.

No matter how much we talk about it and no matter how often and how hard we try, we can't wash the sin away. We will never be able to get the sin out, off, away. It'll keep coming back - no, strike that - it'll never go away. Our obsession with sin is simply another demonstration of our desire for control, our belief that we can actually do something about it.

If we put as much energy into talking about grace as we did about sin, we could change the world. He loves us like no person can ever love a person - ever, now, and always. Love is what won, and love is what wins. Not love by our definition, ensnared by the trappings of our desire for control; rather, love by His definition, only giving and never taking.

I wish we talked about grace more than we talked about sin.

I wish all we talked about was grace.

I wish all we did was love.

I wish.

FAITHWALKERS

Every year between Christmas Day and New Year's Day, our church, along with the sister churches and ministries associated with our family of churches, sponsors a conference called Faithwalkers. I've been able to attend three times now - once in 2007 in Missouri, once in 2009 in Nebraska, and once in 2011 in Colorado. It starts with an evening of worship and prayer, followed by three days (early morning until late night) of worship, prayer, messages, and seminars. Both mentally and physically, it is exhausting, overwhelming, challenging, and uplifting beyond measure.

Each time I've attended, I've left with something powerful to help me in my walk with Christ. The first time, it was focused a lot on myself and my passion for God. The second time, it was centered more on others and living out what God calls us to do. This most recent time, it is revolving primarily around my relationship with God.

I've invested a great deal of energy into working on things from an external perspective; meaning, I need to improve myself and my relationship with my family and friends and others, and I need to play an active role in promoting a positive relationship between others. While this is true, and worthy of my time, I feel I haven't concentrated enough on developing my relationship with God. All blessings flow from this, and all I will take from this world is this; therefore, I know what I need to invest in the most.

And so I walk on with Him.

YOU DID FOR ME

Why do you worship Him? Do you really think He needs that?
No. I do.

How many times have I examined the heart of another when it's my own that needs examination? How many times have I assumed that God is trying to work in the life of another when He's been trying to work in my own life? How many times have I withheld something from a brother or sister believing it was not what they needed when it was not for me to determine but only for me to give freely?

If others had waited to help me feeling that, upon examination of my heart, I needed to learn some lesson because of my brokenness, because of my lack of relationship with God, or because it might "enable" me in some way, I know where I would be. And, it wouldn't be here. And, it wouldn't be with Him.

Our purpose here is not to be God. He's got it covered. Our purpose here is to love others as God loves us. He doesn't need it. We do.

*****

Below are some verses to ponder and some questions to answer ...

I know that the Lord secures justice for the poor and upholds the cause of the needy. ~ Psalm 140:12

If there is a poor man among your brothers in any of the towns of the land that the Lord your God is giving you, do not be hardhearted or tightfisted toward your poor brother. ~ Deuteronomy 15:7

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. ~ Proverbs 31:8

Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. ~ Matthew 5:42

Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. ~ 1 Timothy 6:18

He who is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and He will reward him for what he has done. ~ Proverbs 19:17

Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me. ~ Matthew 19:21

He who oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker, but whoever is kind to the needy honors God. ~ Proverbs 14:31

If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? ~ 1 John 3:17

No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. ~ Matthew 6:24

Which verse stood out the most for you, and why?

Why should we serve those in need?

What is getting in the way of you serving those in need?

How have you served, could you serve, and will you serve those in need?

OMNIPRESENCE

I watched her move the food around on the plate as she sifted through her belongings resting next to her at the table. Expecting her to devour each morsel with ferocity, instead I kept glancing back at her repeatedly over a fairly long time. Her shirt was worn and thin. With dirty hands and nervous looks, she finally made her way through the meal. I wish I would have said something to her, even sat down next to her for a while. Instead, I filled up her water cup, cleaned up the table space she consumed, and wondered where she was headed.

The look in the eyes of someone who has survived an attempt on their own life is unmistakable. It's so empty, so hopeless, so blank, so desolate. Not too far removed is the look in the eyes of the visitor. Wondering why it's happened and desperately seeking some answers, blame settles in for an uncomfortable stay. What does one say when you enter the room? Do you allow silence to dominate the conversation, or do you talk through the thick mask of embarrassment and pain? Slowly but surely, an embrace finally happens, and through tears, hope forms once again.

Lives are taken. When least expected, and often in very tragic ways, death arrives and leaves a mark. Children aren't supposed to be pulled from us, especially before they're born. The congratulatory remarks become piercing barbs as preparing for birth becomes the awkward explanations around loss. Loved ones aren't meant to die in the crumpled remains of an accident, left to pass on alone in darkness. Vulnerability chosen is admired, but our greatest strength comes not from ourselves.

He has been with me through the confusing times, the painful times, the times of loss, and the times of gain. It's easy to remember His presence when we are swimming in joy - as easy as it is to forget His presence when we are drowning in sadness. He is with me every day in every way, just as He's with you as well. Open your heart, your soul, your arms, your life ... and breathe in the love of Christ.

FORTY DAYS

Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, left the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness, where for forty days he was tempted by the devil. He ate nothing during those days, and at the end of them he was hungry.
~ Luke 4:1-2

Forty is a fairly significant number in The Bible. Actually, forty is a fairly significant number in life. I recently turned forty and it's fairly significant to me, anyway.

Alece Ronzino promotes the idea of having one word to focus on during a year. It's inspiring, encouraging, challenging.

As I navigate my way through life, I'm continually seeking God's will in transforming me. Less me and more Him is the goal. More Him leads to more others and less me, and that's what I'm striving for. I know, though, it's not good enough to just sit back and wait without making any effort to listen and respond to His will. So, I set my sights on a yearly goal, knowing that I need to make concentrated efforts day to day.

Forty days. It's manageable and it's meaningful, and it's what I've chosen to focus on as I yield to God. There are very specific things getting in the way of my relationship with Him and others. With His strength, I am overcoming those things one step at a time. What's getting in the way of your relationship with Him and others? Are you willing to commit to forty days? And then, another forty days? And then?

With Him, you can do it, I can do it, we can do it.