Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Sometimes I can't even muster up the energy to pray on my way to work. It's my little ritual, helping me establish direction for the day. My moment of clarity, if you will. Still, sometimes all I can do is flip on the radio station and listen to K-LOVE or WAY-FM, hoping to find some encouragement or perhaps an explanation of how I connected with God today. I'm not even sure who I think I need to explain this to, if not myself.
The need to feel as though I am in relationship with Jesus Christ isn't born out of guilt, though. I have plenty of history with understanding what my life is like when I'm not leaning on The Lord. Indeed, my connection is recognized as essential to me as breathing. Breathing, however, I can do without any effort at all. I'm not consciously reaching into some reservoir for the energy required to just take in air - You know, it's even like eating and drinking - I just do it (and typically excessively at that).
So, I beg my soul for the desire to shift out of neutral. I turn to Him like I always do when I really want to get something accomplished, when I know I need something accomplished. And, He delivers, as always. Dylan Thomas wrote, "The force that drives the water through the rocks drives my red blood," and I know what that Force is. That Force intimately knows me. I depend on that Force to feed me clarity that I can gain through no effort of my own. And, when I least expect it, the necessity of the moment hits me.
This is my command: Love each other. ~ John 15:17
Does it get any easier than this? Can it be made any more clear to us? Must we endlessly seek out ways to exclude ourselves from this commandment, or exclude others from benefiting from this commandment? Certainly everyone reads that and gets it, right? What kind of interpretation is needed here? Why do we have to go and mess this up with our self-righteous comments like, "God helps those who help themselves."? I mean, what else goes so far against Biblical Truth than a statement like that? And my enlightenment reminds me of the pervasiveness of my pride, and how it consistently overwhelms even the hint of humility.
And on I go, looking for answers, and resting in the certainty of His grace and love.